Public Image

Okay, it appears that the time for serious discourse has passed and the time for merriment is upon us. As an effort to educate Virginia Beach Public Library staff members on the new and exciting applications available online, we were to create funny pictures.

M'kay.

Not that I'm one to shy away from any opportunity to goof off, but I felt kind of guilty looking through the offerings hinted at by the benevolent director of this little experiment. That is, until I found FD Toy's Motivator. Everyone has seen these; they are the things managers put on the walls when real human motivation is not really an option. Said higher-ups would rather put up a poster that says "LEADERSHIP: something displayed every day" underneath a picture of a mountain climber rather than display any actual leadership. I used to work as a telemarketer. Every square inch of spare wall space was covered by these inane sayings. In a way, they were darkly humorous, like House or certain episodes of M*A*S*H. Take, for instance, a poster urging ETHICS over the middle manager who always fleeced his sales reps to make an extra buck. Or VIRTUE over that one rep who most certainly lacked any sense of Victorian propriety. Great to have at parties, though. The sales rep, not the poster.

Anyway, my brain immediately came up with dozens of inappropriate and hilarious uses for this "tool". Most of which are, naturally, not going to appear here. I like having the account, and Google does censor egregious posts.